Well...what do you know...it's uh...what time is it *looks at lower right hand corner of laptop* OH! It's about 3:23am, well....that's nice. Hello weary mind...I see you're up again. Are we gonna write about that stuff you were thinking about...uhm...maybe...lets see...
Oh yes, my Beloved and I. I read things occasionally about divine counterparts and twin flames and soul mates and such. The relationship between masculine and feminine energy greatly interests me. I feel that the concept of this is an integral part in all of our lives going much deeper than the simple appearance of "Man" and "Woman" and their connotative roles and meanings. Though I wont really get into info and definitions and such. I'm not very good at textbook explanations. Here is my experience:
My lover and I are like Yin and Yang. This is what I have come to view our interactions as. We are largely opposite in the way we do approach and deal with things. For this reason we are often at arms against each other, thankfully we are conscious enough to see this and thus our exchange never goes past the boiling point into verbal or physical abuse...at least not in any serious sense. Our words tend to bite, being as sharp as we in our debates, and we tend to nudge each other aggressively in some way if it's really bad but...it's all dramatics and side ways looks of knowing in the end. We recognize that we are often on opposite ends of the world, it amazes us both every day that we have managed to make a harmony from this.
Something I have noticed about us is that we tend to go in this cycle every month or so (at least that is my idea, again my figuring of linear time tend to be way off so I am really going off feeling here). I notice lessons come into our lives, the natures of which would be too hard to try to recount with all the intricacies involved and the many of examples. The point is, an issue or issues arise and we each take our stand and beliefs on why it is happening. We battle, as is natural apparently in the resolution of things, and go through a period of time where we feel disconnected (other issues arise from this which we must inevitably push to the side to get the the greater issue). The battling is just a series of weird conversations where we talk around a problem that neither of us seem to be able to grasp the full extent of or articulate properly for the understanding of the other.
At some point we reason to just let it go and stay out of each others way while the string of tension is still sensitive and there's a a period of time where we're just alright. We're not particularly honeymooning deep in love as elves like we usually are nor are we at arms at least...we make serious attempts not to be. This is rather the "Truce." period I suppose where we kinda just say fuck it until whatever piece is missing that will allow the issue to be solved surfaces. At some point, us both weary in our time feeling the energetic separateness and being on opposite sides of the universe we miraculously come to settle into a conversation that allows us both to come to some conclusion about the matter. Then we're at peace, the tension is gone, its awesome. Both parties have articulating their feelings and logic on the matter to some degree of fulfillment and understanding and we're good, on common ground.
Then, things flip...somehow. This is where the image of the yin yang comes to mind. And we find ourselves right back where we started only...on opposite side of experiences. It's like I can see things from the view he once had and he is now seeing the situation as me. An utter perspective change that even bleeds into our dimeaner and characteristics. We even end up using each others words, the very word we used on opposite side to explain ourselves in the first half of this experience. I see each of us in each other, blending and switching for all kinds of reasons. I feel like this happens so that we can resolve things as a whole unit. It is not enough for one to see one way and the other another even if we do find middle ground. No...we must take this experience in full and see each other go through it and view it from our perspective on the outside and also experience each side within ourselves and reflect on it from within.
I'd like to call this interchange Divine...I hardly know what the word means honestly but it feels right to call it so.I think its beautiful and Sacred the way my lover and I are in our relationship. We tackle reality together, so often unsure and surely frustrated along the way. But in our swirling we make it work, as man and woman, woman and man, yin and yang, yang and yin....
It drives me nuts sometimes but that's alright. Like this last week has been really bonkers. Illusions and emotions.... Reality and reason seeming to slip just out of our grasp every time *shaking my head* And in the midst of that...trying to birth my Soul into myself....yeah...self soul birthing...I'm gonna make that a separate post...
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